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00:00:01
The best way to watch Crossroads Church is
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00:00:03
on your smart TV, because that's where your family hangs out.
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00:00:06
And plus, taking a break from your phone and tablet feels good.
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00:00:11
Download the Crossroads TV app on your smart TV
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00:00:14
and your TV becomes your church,
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00:00:17
your community,
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00:00:19
your new rhythm, your "I finally went to church this week!"
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Set a time to experience church on your TV.
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00:00:28
See, you've already made your TV smarter.
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00:00:30
Download the Crossroads TV app,
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it'll give you the boost you and your family need for your week.
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00:00:38
- Hi, everyone, and welcome to Crossroads Church.
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00:00:41
I'm so glad that you joined us today. I'm Hannah.
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00:00:43
- And I'm Kyle, and you are with us on the start
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00:00:46
of the first week of the Good God Journey.
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00:00:48
It's five weeks to get to a new place
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00:00:50
in our understanding of this question of is God good?
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00:00:54
We're going to be your host for this entire thing,
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00:00:56
I think, right?
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00:00:57
- Yes, exactly right, which is so exciting because
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00:00:59
this world has kind of seemed really dark in 2020.
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00:01:03
And to ask yourself the question, is God good?
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00:01:06
No matter the circumstances, we knew we had to be all in
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00:01:09
in trying to find the answer to that question.
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00:01:11
We knew --
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00:01:12
- -- that we had to be your hosts.
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00:01:13
And also we kind of work here, and so sometimes
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00:01:16
they tell us to just stuff and then we --
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- They said, be here.
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- We're like, OK.
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And they also said be ready for anything.
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00:01:21
So we are ready for anything officially -- Oh my gosh.
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00:01:24
- OK, ok.
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00:01:25
- Yellow box, crack it open.
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00:01:29
Ok, are we supposed to wear these?
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00:01:32
This is not in my contract.
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00:01:33
- Hey, I don't think this is the one.
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00:01:36
- This is awful.
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00:01:40
- Good God!
- Yeah!
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00:01:42
Paint can, paintbrush, it is a key.
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00:01:45
- Let's go. All right.
- Oh, wow.
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00:01:47
- Do you think that's it?
- I think that's it.
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00:01:49
- Oh, okay. Dang.
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00:01:52
- Oh, yeah.
- Let's do this thing.
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00:01:54
- Hey.
- All right.
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00:01:55
- Hey, it's three pedals.
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00:01:57
I think this is a stick shift.
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00:01:59
- Do you know how to drive a stick shift?
- No.
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00:02:01
- (laughs)
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00:02:02
- You know, right?
- I do not.
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00:02:04
I've got this.
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00:02:06
Okay, nothing's happening now.
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00:02:07
- No.
- Help!
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00:02:09
- You guys want some help?
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00:02:10
- Really, I can help you.
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00:02:11
So you're going to follow this diagram right here.
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00:02:14
- OK, Ernie, come on.
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00:02:15
- Come on, Ernie.
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00:02:17
- A little feather a little more gas, a little more gas.
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00:02:18
Okay, so you stalled.
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00:02:19
- Aww!
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00:02:20
- It's the first time.
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00:02:22
- Put him in first, but him in first because
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00:02:23
now you're going to stop. That's right.
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00:02:25
This is where Hannah stalled. It's all good.
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00:02:27
Give it some gas first.
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00:02:28
Let your clutch out a little bit.
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00:02:30
You're in first, you're good. (indiscernible)
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00:02:33
Gas. Clutch in first, clutch, clutch. Second.
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00:02:37
- Yeah!
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Good, good, good, good, get more gas, more gas. Yeah.
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00:02:44
- Oh, baby!
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00:02:45
- Clutch, clutch. Third.
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00:02:49
Should be good, should be good.
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00:02:51
Nice, Hannah. All right, turn around.
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00:02:55
Break, break.
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00:02:56
- I'm breaking, I'm breaking.
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00:02:58
- You guys did great. Go ahead and turn the engine off.
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00:03:00
- OK. All right.
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00:03:01
- I don't think you need any more. - What?
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00:03:08
- What? - Okay. Who was that?
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00:03:12
- I don't know. I feel like we got schooled by a soccer mom.
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00:03:14
- Yeah, we definitely did.
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00:03:16
- It's probably time to just get this Journey started, I think.
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00:03:19
- I think we should go. We are ready. We got this.
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00:03:21
- Yeah. Listen, 2020 has been a crazy year for all of us,
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00:03:24
but no matter what circumstance you find yourself in,
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God can be a good God to you.
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00:03:31
And I look to my friend and say
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I'll bet you $20 twenty years from now
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this will be a moment worth a million
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00:03:43
behind us there’s a shadow
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from Rays of light that shine on us so
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00:03:50
6 feet of emotion
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00:03:53
laid off and the money gone
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00:03:55
only good credits bad credit
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00:03:57
Bad news from the media
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00:03:59
Good God it’s a war zone
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00:04:01
What gives what matters
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00:04:04
Some couldn't give a fraction
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00:04:07
whole world of distractions
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00:04:10
I may be shaken up
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00:04:13
but I won't let it get me down
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00:04:16
nothing else to say
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00:04:17
oh I got
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00:04:19
one five
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00:04:20
five ones
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00:04:21
one ten
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00:04:22
And I step to my friend and say
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(Good God)
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I’ll bet ya $20 twenty years from now
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00:04:28
(Good God)
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00:04:29
this’ll be a moment worth a million
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00:04:33
(Good God)
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00:04:34
behind us there’s a shadow
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00:04:36
(Good God)
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00:04:37
from Rays of light that shine on us so
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00:04:40
So brilliant
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00:04:43
Brilliant
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00:04:44
(Good God)
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00:04:46
Ray of light that shine on us so brilliant
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00:04:50
So Brilliant
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00:04:51
Brilliant
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00:04:52
(Good God)
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00:05:16
Oh I may be shaken up
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00:05:20
but won’t let it get me down
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00:05:23
nothing else to say
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00:05:25
oh I got
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00:05:27
one five
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00:05:28
five ones
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00:05:29
one ten
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00:05:30
And I step to my friend and say
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00:05:32
Good God
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00:05:33
I’ll bet ya $20 twenty years from now
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00:05:35
Good God
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00:05:36
this’ll be a moment worth a million
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00:05:39
Good God
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00:05:41
behind us there’s a shadow
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00:05:44
(Good God)
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00:05:45
from Rays of light that shine on us so
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00:05:48
So brilliant
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00:05:49
Brilliant
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00:05:51
(Good God)
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00:05:54
Ray of light that shine on us so brilliant
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00:05:56
So Brilliant
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00:05:58
Brilliant
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00:05:59
(Good God)
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00:06:36
- Hey, my name is Brian, welcome to The Journey,
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00:06:40
a five week journey to look at one of the key elements
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00:06:44
of the identity of God that He is good.
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00:06:46
Do you believe that He's good? A lot of us don't.
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00:06:48
We're going to look into that because it's critical
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00:06:50
for us to be people of faith and have a life that works.
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00:06:53
In the Book of Psalm 32:8 it says:
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00:07:05
Taste and see. (smacks lips)
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00:07:09
Taste, Mmmm. (smacks lips)
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00:07:10
Is it good or is it not good? Taste and see.
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00:07:15
We have a friend of ours who lived with us for a while,
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00:07:18
my, my wife and I.
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00:07:19
He lived with us and he had the weirdest taste buds.
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00:07:23
It's like if it wasn't a hot dog
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00:07:26
or it wasn't covered in ketchup
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00:07:28
or it wasn't mac and cheese, he wasn't interested in it at all.
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00:07:32
Like not at all.
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00:07:34
So we just do normal food that normal adults make
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00:07:37
and put it out before him.
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00:07:38
We called him Wazy, and Wazy was like (sound effect).
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00:07:41
He didn't -- he didn't like it.
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00:07:42
He wouldn't taste to see if something was good.
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00:07:45
What do you know, we we ended up pushing his taste buds a bit.
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00:07:49
But then I also learned a bit of his story.
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00:07:51
I realized he had a very dramatic and traumatic upbringing
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00:07:56
as a child and basically no one was really looking after him.
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00:08:00
And so an easy meal to throw in front of him was a hot dog
-
00:08:03
or something squirted with ketchup or mac and cheese,
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00:08:06
was just pushed that way.
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00:08:09
He hadn't developed taste buds to taste things.
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00:08:13
I want you and I to develop taste buds
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00:08:16
to understand is God good?
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00:08:18
This is the question that drives everything else in your life.
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00:08:22
It will drive how you feel about your life.
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00:08:24
It will drive how you react to adversity in your life.
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00:08:27
It will drive how you respond to God,
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00:08:29
how you pray to God.
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00:08:30
It'll drive your faith.
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00:08:32
It will.
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00:08:34
I'm here in something that I really don't want to be in at all.
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00:08:40
It's a waiting room. I hate waiting rooms. I do.
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00:08:46
Do you know why I don't like waiting rooms?
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00:08:48
Because I don't like what's represented in waiting rooms.
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00:08:51
Waiting rooms represent pain for me.
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00:08:55
I'm waiting in a room before I go into the dentist.
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00:08:59
I'm waiting in the waiting room
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00:09:00
before I go into a counseling thing.
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00:09:03
I'm waiting in a waiting room while something painful
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00:09:07
is happening to somebody else on the other side of the wall.
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00:09:11
I was in a waiting room a number of years ago
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00:09:14
when we had opening night at
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00:09:17
our Christmas production at Crossroads.
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00:09:19
We had a woman, Carrie.
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00:09:21
Carrie fell 30 feet
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00:09:23
and I went and sat in this waiting room
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00:09:26
wondering what, what, what does this mean, God?
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00:09:31
What does this mean for this woman's future,
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00:09:34
first year college student?
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00:09:35
What it meant was she died.
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00:09:39
What would this mean for the church's future?
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00:09:42
God, who are You that on a Christmas production,
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00:09:46
if everything is supposed to be going well any place
-
00:09:49
it would be in a Christmas production.
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00:09:51
How can You be good?
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00:09:55
It wasn't too long ago I was in a waiting room like this
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00:09:57
waiting for my friend Kathy, who was on the other side
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00:10:00
waiting to receive me, as cancer was ravaging her body.
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00:10:05
And this woman was a rock in my life.
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00:10:08
I mean, just a rock. She was solid.
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00:10:11
She helped me with my leadership.
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00:10:13
She helped me with my faith.
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00:10:15
Actually, she was the most grace giving,
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00:10:17
fun loving person that had just crazy wisdom.
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00:10:21
She was a female banker of the year
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00:10:22
back in her business heyday. Amazing.
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00:10:26
And when I saw her, as I prayed with her,
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00:10:30
God said no to those prayers and Cathy died.
-
00:10:36
Not a lot of evidence in waiting rooms for me
-
00:10:39
over exactly is God good or not.
-
00:10:43
And there was another day that I was in a waiting room
-
00:10:48
just like this, where beforehand I was going about my day,
-
00:10:52
doing my thing and and my phone rang.
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00:10:55
And I picked up my phone and said hello.
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00:10:58
And my oldest daughter, Lena was on her side
-
00:11:00
and she was panting, out of breath.
-
00:11:02
She said, "Dad, dad, have you heard?
-
00:11:04
Have you heard about mom?"
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00:11:05
I said, "Um, No."
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00:11:07
"Mom just collapsed working out.
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00:11:10
She's in an ambulance. She had a stroke.
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00:11:12
She's going to the hospital."
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00:11:15
"I'll be there." Click.
-
00:11:17
I went into my truck, getting to where I'm going.
-
00:11:21
And while I'm going there
-
00:11:25
my mind is just starting to mess with me.
-
00:11:27
My mind inside is like a Rolodex of all my life events now.
-
00:11:32
One of the upsides some days,
-
00:11:34
downsides other days of my job
-
00:11:36
is the number of prayer requests I get.
-
00:11:40
And when people text me or email me for prayer
-
00:11:44
like they're never emailing me, "Hey, Brian, great news.
-
00:11:48
I just got a raise.
-
00:11:50
Just pray for me that I'm more thankful to God."
-
00:11:52
I never get those ones.
-
00:11:54
The prayers I get are,
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00:11:55
"Hey, my child has a brain aneurysm.
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00:12:01
Would you pray for me?"
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00:12:03
"My friend, he just had a heart attack.
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00:12:07
He's got two young kids. Would you pray for him?"
-
00:12:09
"Hey, my mom got a stroke."
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00:12:12
"My dad had a stroke."
-
00:12:14
so when I hear a stroke with my wife,
-
00:12:17
I go inside the Rolodex and I look inside there.
-
00:12:21
And I go, "Stroke. What do I have for stroke?
-
00:12:22
Stroke, stroke, stroke, what's in there?"
-
00:12:24
And and I pull up the Rolodex, what's in my memory
-
00:12:29
of the things I pray for, how it ended was:
-
00:12:31
feeding tube,
-
00:12:34
cane,
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00:12:37
wheelchair,
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00:12:40
drooling,
-
00:12:44
incommunicative.
-
00:12:48
That day and that waiting room would define my faith.
-
00:12:55
It wouldn't reduce my faith or change my faith,
-
00:12:58
but it would actually define what my faith was.
-
00:13:02
Did I trust in God?
-
00:13:04
Did I believe things would be OK?
-
00:13:06
Did I believe that God was good?
-
00:13:13
To understand this, this question that we're going
-
00:13:15
to be going through this entire time,
-
00:13:18
we all have a box, a box of disappointments,
-
00:13:22
a box of pain that makes us question
-
00:13:27
whether or not God is good.
-
00:13:29
I don't know what's in your box.
-
00:13:31
Could be things like financial ruin, personal bankruptcy,
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00:13:36
didn't get into the school that I wanted,
-
00:13:37
lost a child, had a divorce.
-
00:13:45
This box of disappointments is wreaking havoc on our faith
-
00:13:53
or defining our faith all the time.
-
00:14:00
When you take a look at the Bible and you open up the Bible.
-
00:14:03
Oh, what do you know, here we go.
-
00:14:05
Someone's a religious person.
-
00:14:06
And you actually open up the Bible,
-
00:14:09
coming out of the pages of the Bible,
-
00:14:12
I want you to imagine a DNA strand, a double helix,
-
00:14:17
one of those ladder twisty things that comes up
-
00:14:20
outside of the Bible.
-
00:14:22
The Bible can be a very confusing
-
00:14:25
and seemingly contradictory book.
-
00:14:28
It's not contradicting itself so much as
-
00:14:31
there's tensions in the Bible.
-
00:14:33
There's sort of opposing extremes in the Bible.
-
00:14:36
In the midst of that tension is where God resides.
-
00:14:41
Is God one or is God a Trinity?
-
00:14:46
Is my faith what gets me to God
-
00:14:49
or does my works get me before God?
-
00:14:52
Do I have personal responsibility for my life
-
00:14:54
or is there the sovereignty of God in my life?
-
00:14:58
And the answer is, yes,
-
00:15:00
God is one, and He exists in three persons.
-
00:15:03
Yes, yes, my faith in Christ gets me to God
-
00:15:07
and if I don't have works, then my faith is dead.
-
00:15:11
Yes, God's given me one life.
-
00:15:13
I'm supposed to manage that life,
-
00:15:14
take control of that life.
-
00:15:15
And God is sovereign.
-
00:15:17
He is ultimately in control of everything.
-
00:15:19
See, these things are opposed to one another,
-
00:15:21
they're just a bit complex.
-
00:15:23
And so too, there's these opposite extremes
-
00:15:26
of understanding God that comes
-
00:15:27
through every single story in the Bible.
-
00:15:31
It is whether God is a Father, a good Father,
-
00:15:35
or He is a good King.
-
00:15:37
Wait, is He a Father who nurtures and who comforts
-
00:15:44
or is He a King who rules and who conquers?
-
00:15:50
Yes, yes, He's both of those things, actually.
-
00:15:52
He's both of those things.
-
00:15:53
And based on what mood He's in at a specific time,
-
00:15:57
He's going to behave a certain way in that time.
-
00:16:00
All of us are complex creatures.
-
00:16:01
You can't just reduce you to like, "Oh, you're a jock.
-
00:16:03
Oh, you're a jock, so therefore you don't think."
-
00:16:05
No, it doesn't work that way.
-
00:16:06
"Oh, so you're you're an accountant,
-
00:16:08
so therefore you're an accountant, but you don't do bench presses."
-
00:16:11
No, no, no. It doesn't work that way.
-
00:16:14
And we keep trying to reduce God being one
-
00:16:16
or the other of these things.
-
00:16:17
He's either lovey dovey,
-
00:16:18
nice feely father who makes me feel good
-
00:16:21
or He's kind of strong king that's doing His thing.
-
00:16:25
Jesus says in the book of John 5:17:
-
00:16:34
My father is working, and what exactly is God working on?
-
00:16:39
Jesus talked about the Kingdom of God.
-
00:16:41
What does every kingdom have?
-
00:16:42
Every kingdom has a king.
-
00:16:46
The Father is working as a King.
-
00:16:49
He's ruling and He's working on an agenda
-
00:16:53
that transcends our agenda,
-
00:16:55
that is a higher arching agenda,
-
00:16:58
and is something that you and I cannot fathom,
-
00:17:00
it is more important than you and I would ever actually want.
-
00:17:04
Jesus says in Luke 18:
-
00:17:10
He's good as a Father. He's good as a King.
-
00:17:14
If you miss God as a Father, you miss out.
-
00:17:18
You can't understand His goodness.
-
00:17:20
If you miss God as a King, you miss out
-
00:17:24
and you can't understand Him as His powerfulness,
-
00:17:26
His goodness.
-
00:17:27
We need both of these things.
-
00:17:29
The question that we're going to be asking
-
00:17:32
this entire Journey is: Is God good?
-
00:17:39
Is he good?
-
00:17:41
Some of us just don't have an ability
-
00:17:42
to get over our bitterness.
-
00:17:44
And we're bitter and our box of disappointments
-
00:17:47
have hurt us so much that we put that on God and say,
-
00:17:54
"Well, if there's a God, then He must not care about me."
-
00:17:55
Our culture has become increasingly weak.
-
00:17:59
Every culture in all of world history has had problems
-
00:18:02
and has had pain and has had heartaches
-
00:18:04
and it has had famines and has had wars.
-
00:18:07
All of them have in every culture
-
00:18:08
throughout all of human history
-
00:18:11
has an understanding of God or the transcendence,
-
00:18:14
every single one.
-
00:18:17
And you don't see them all just abandon their idea of God,
-
00:18:21
whatever is their idea as soon as they have pain.
-
00:18:23
But in our culture, because we believe that we're actually God,
-
00:18:27
we believe that my ways are always the right ways.
-
00:18:30
We believe my feelings are always the most important thing,
-
00:18:33
my feelings, whenever something doesn't go our way,
-
00:18:37
the way we want it to go, we're left with
-
00:18:40
a core conviction that there must not be a God
-
00:18:44
or God isn't good.
-
00:18:46
Friends, we've got to get by,
-
00:18:48
we've got to get over this thing of
-
00:18:49
when life isn't going my way, then somehow there's not a God.
-
00:18:53
That's why the atheism numbers and the agnostics numbers
-
00:18:56
keep going up because I can't reconcile
-
00:18:58
my life isn't going well,
-
00:18:59
and I thought God was all about me and my life.
-
00:19:02
He's not all about you and your life.
-
00:19:04
He is about you. He does love you
-
00:19:07
and He cares for you greatly as a Father would,
-
00:19:09
and He's a King.
-
00:19:10
I've got all kinds of disappointments in my life, a lot of them.
-
00:19:41
I can't bench press 400 pounds anymore.
-
00:19:42
I never could bench press 400 pounds, I don't even --
-
00:19:45
I don't even know what I can bench press at all period
-
00:19:46
right now, but whatever it was, it's less right now.
-
00:19:50
When you're in disappointment,
-
00:19:53
when your box of disappointments is full,
-
00:19:55
when you are going down how do you respond to God?
-
00:20:00
We don't want to gloss over the pain that we have.
-
00:20:02
We don't want to avoid the difficult conversation
-
00:20:05
that these things bring up.
-
00:20:07
In this Journey we want to look right at it.
-
00:20:09
We want to look right at those things,
-
00:20:11
and we want to see if God will actually do something about it.
-
00:20:16
- Man, we're jumping in, asking the big question right away:
-
00:20:19
is God good?
-
00:20:20
Just like Brian, I know in my life I have those moments
-
00:20:22
that feel like, yeah, He's definitely good,
-
00:20:24
moments when stuff works out the way I want it to.
-
00:20:25
And then I have other moments where maybe
-
00:20:27
I pray to ask for something
-
00:20:28
and I didn't get what I wanted, real lost, real grief.
-
00:20:31
And it's a real question: Is God good?
-
00:20:33
That we have to ask in all the areas of our life.
-
00:20:35
- Absolutely.
-
00:20:36
That question applies in one specific area even: our money.
-
00:20:40
We get to ask, is God good with our money?
-
00:20:42
And listen, I'm a tither because I just believe
-
00:20:45
that God can do more with my money than I can.
-
00:20:48
And He has answered that question that, yes, He is good.
-
00:20:51
- That word that Hannah used, tithe, it's in the Bible
-
00:20:53
and actually a test that God invites us all to take
-
00:20:56
to see whether He is a good God
-
00:20:58
when it comes to our finances.
-
00:20:59
If you want to know more about that,
-
00:21:00
you can go to Crossroads.net/give.
-
00:21:02
- Well, next, I'm super excited because
-
00:21:04
I get to talk to my friend Sean
-
00:21:06
who's had to ask the big question: is God good
-
00:21:09
in the middle of some really tough circumstances.
-
00:21:12
So I'm going to go talk to him next.
-
00:21:27
- We're in a Good God Journey where, unfortunately,
-
00:21:30
I don't think a lot of people believe that God's good.
-
00:21:32
And I know you have an incredible story
-
00:21:35
about experiencing the goodness of God,
-
00:21:38
despite some pretty unique,
-
00:21:40
what some might even say is crazy circumstances.
-
00:21:43
- The week of Thanksgiving 2008, I'm happily married,
-
00:21:47
young, 28 years old, and my wife and I,
-
00:21:50
we were expecting the birth of our firstborn.
-
00:21:53
And it was that Wednesday I received a phone call at work
-
00:21:57
from my wife, it turned out that
-
00:21:58
she was having some heart palpitations.
-
00:22:01
We were due in the end of March.
-
00:22:05
On January 11, Mardee's body decided to go into labor.
-
00:22:10
So they rushed her into surgery.
-
00:22:12
They came out and they let us know that we had a baby girl
-
00:22:15
and we were 29 weeks, 2 days.
-
00:22:18
She was two pounds. She was a micro preemie.
-
00:22:21
My wedding ring was the size of her hand.
-
00:22:24
She was on oxygen, but that's normal for a child born that young.
-
00:22:27
Mardee got to come home
-
00:22:29
and we made our daily trips to the hospital
-
00:22:32
and about a month passes
-
00:22:35
and she's having a really hard time healing.
-
00:22:40
She has a follow up appointment and they say,
-
00:22:42
"Well, you know, we need to send you back to hospital,
-
00:22:44
flush out some of the fluids, and then you should be fine."
-
00:22:46
And she was there for a day.
-
00:22:48
And then in the morning of February 10th,
-
00:22:50
I got a call at 5:00 in the morning from her phone.
-
00:22:54
And it's not her on the other end of the phone.
-
00:22:57
And it's a doctor and he says,
-
00:23:01
"Hey, you need to get here right away."
-
00:23:03
And she had stopped breathing
-
00:23:06
and they weren't able to recover her.
-
00:23:09
And so -- so she dies.
-
00:23:15
I can remember just feeling lost.
-
00:23:21
You just miss your friend, you miss your wife,
-
00:23:23
you miss everything, everything.
-
00:23:27
And, you know, we had -- we prayed the whole time
-
00:23:32
that we'd get through it and be able to live the life
-
00:23:37
that we had planned with each other.
-
00:23:40
And that just wasn't going to happen.
-
00:23:42
And I can remember --
-
00:23:45
I can remember everything, the smell the room,
-
00:23:48
I can -- the feel her touch.
-
00:23:53
I can't remember, just --
-
00:23:55
I don't know where the prayer came from, but it was,
-
00:23:57
you know, God, thank you, like,
-
00:24:00
the first thing that came out of my mouth was gratitude.
-
00:24:03
I don't know where that came from.
-
00:24:06
And I just plead with God really to heal my heart.
-
00:24:11
I didn't want to be angry with Him.
-
00:24:13
I asked Him, you know, don't let any seeds of bitterness
-
00:24:17
take root and ask someone to watch over Lily
-
00:24:19
and the rest of the family as we had no idea
-
00:24:22
how we were going to navigate the next season of our lives.
-
00:24:27
And we bury Mardee on Valentine's Day.
-
00:24:30
And I get a phone call from the hospital
-
00:24:32
and it's them telling us -- telling me
-
00:24:39
that Lily's health had taken a turn for the worst.
-
00:24:43
I think the first thought was, "You've got to be kidding me."
-
00:24:46
Like it's just this too much. I can't shoulder this.
-
00:24:51
I can remember thinking, like, "I don't get this God.
-
00:24:55
Like, I need You to show up.
-
00:25:00
I don't feel like You are."
-
00:25:05
And I can remember feeling powerless, really.
-
00:25:11
There's nothing I could do.
-
00:25:15
I mean, my wife's gone, my baby's in an incubator.
-
00:25:17
You know, I had a lots of ups and downs
-
00:25:19
in terms of wrestling with my faith,
-
00:25:21
of wrestling with why God would allow that to happen,
-
00:25:28
maybe not to me, but to Lily.
-
00:25:33
She fortunately, she rallied.
-
00:25:36
She spent four months in the NICU,
-
00:25:38
but she just surpassed every benchmark medically
-
00:25:40
that she was supposed to.
-
00:25:43
So we make it their first summer.
-
00:25:44
And I'm at a Saturday service with my mom.
-
00:25:49
I greet the person to my left, and she doesn't say hi.
-
00:25:52
She goes, "You're Lily's dad."
-
00:25:54
I think, "That's weird."
-
00:25:57
It turns out she taught with Mardee's best friend.
-
00:26:00
And when we were sick and in the hospital,
-
00:26:04
they started praying for us and that sort of thing.
-
00:26:08
Months passed and that friendship blossomed
-
00:26:11
into a relationship and we've married.
-
00:26:14
We've got three more beautiful kids, so four total.
-
00:26:18
So when I look back at some of the things that
-
00:26:21
have come of what's a seemingly dark moment in my life,
-
00:26:26
that Lily never -- she doesn't have a memory
-
00:26:29
that is absent of a mother's love.
-
00:26:33
In God's own time that first prayer that I said,
-
00:26:38
I didn't have bitterness; I had hope.
-
00:26:42
And you just hold on.
-
00:26:44
If you give Him a chance,
-
00:26:47
He might do something pretty awesome.
-
00:26:58
- There's a vast difference between
-
00:26:59
God creating something good out of a bad situation
-
00:27:01
and calling a bad situation good,
-
00:27:07
just trying to go, "La, la, la, it's good,"
-
00:27:09
and denying reality.
-
00:27:11
The latter is what we tend to do because we try to gloss
-
00:27:14
over the pain and the difficult conversation
-
00:27:17
that a lot of these things brings to us.
-
00:27:20
But it comes back to the core idea of trust.
-
00:27:22
Do we trust that these things can both be true at the same time?
-
00:27:27
That this is a thing that's difficult,
-
00:27:29
this is the thing that's awful,
-
00:27:31
this is a thing that's in my box of disappointments
-
00:27:35
and good can come out of it.
-
00:27:38
We want to get to a place where we can actually say
-
00:27:42
with confidence, God is good, He is good.
-
00:27:48
I don't want to just ask that question.
-
00:27:49
I want to say God is good.
-
00:27:52
Romans 8:28, it says:
-
00:28:03
All things work together for good.
-
00:28:06
All things.
-
00:28:07
All things work together to make my life the way I want it?
-
00:28:09
No.
-
00:28:10
All things work together to make me feel good?
-
00:28:14
No. A lot of them. I like feeling good.
-
00:28:18
Raise your hand if you like feeling good.
-
00:28:19
I like feeling good.
-
00:28:21
God's not against -- I have sometimes people say to me,
-
00:28:24
"Well, you know, Crossroads, they just want you
-
00:28:28
to feel good. It's a feel good church."
-
00:28:30
And your point is?
-
00:28:32
Oh, that's what I want to do.
-
00:28:34
I want to go to a church that makes me feel bad.
-
00:28:36
That's what I want to do.
-
00:28:37
I want to -- I'm only going to hear a sermon
-
00:28:39
unless I feel like a turd afterwards.
-
00:28:41
Where do we -- where do we get these ideas?
-
00:28:43
Yes, it's OK to feel good.
-
00:28:46
But the point of life is not the feel good.
-
00:28:50
The point of life is to serve God.
-
00:28:52
It's OK to have things go really, really well.
-
00:28:55
But my drive and passion can't have things
-
00:28:57
go really, really well.
-
00:28:58
If I have faith it's to really get well at understanding God.
-
00:29:04
And it's hard to see God is good
-
00:29:06
when we don't see our miracle.
-
00:29:08
When Carrie dies after falling at the Christmas show,
-
00:29:12
when Cathy dies after all the prayers that took place.
-
00:29:18
Like how does God cause all things to work together for good?
-
00:29:23
They died, it didn't work.
-
00:29:27
Well, maybe their stories are helping you and I
-
00:29:30
understand something right now, it's contributing
-
00:29:32
to how something has been working together for good.
-
00:29:38
I was wrestling with that question
-
00:29:42
while in the waiting room.
-
00:29:44
And I was just -- I was remembering all the pain
-
00:29:50
and heartaches associated with waiting.
-
00:29:55
As I was going internal and thinking about things
-
00:29:59
and fixating on things and thinking, "Oh, no, what if..?"
-
00:30:03
"Does this mean I've had my last conversation with my wife?"
-
00:30:08
Because I don't know many people have talked after a stroke.
-
00:30:13
Does this -- does this mean --
-
00:30:16
Does this mean that I've taken my last walk with my wife?
-
00:30:23
Does this mean every meal I'm going to have with my wife
-
00:30:25
I'm going to be feeding her?
-
00:30:28
What does this mean?
-
00:30:30
As I was with her in the waiting room
-
00:30:32
when I got to the hospital and the kids were coming
-
00:30:34
and they were all filing in one by one.
-
00:30:36
My wife was -- Libby was lying there.
-
00:30:38
And lay and she couldn't move anything.
-
00:30:41
All she could do is open,
-
00:30:42
her eyes are open real wide, like she was terrified,.
-
00:30:44
She's just looking around like, "I can't talk.
-
00:30:47
I don't -- I don't know what's going on."
-
00:30:50
She couldn't move.
-
00:30:54
Got the family around, put our hands on her, prayed for her.
-
00:30:58
I don't know what the nurse and doctors thought,
-
00:31:01
but like I don't care, I'm going to God here right now.
-
00:31:05
We have to go to Him.
-
00:31:06
We're putting our hands on her and we're praying for her.
-
00:31:11
Prayed that God would heal her.
-
00:31:12
We prayed that the medicine would do what it needs to do,
-
00:31:15
the medical professionals can do what they need to do.
-
00:31:18
We're praying and then she was gone
-
00:31:19
and she was whisked away.
-
00:31:20
And I said, "That's it.
-
00:31:23
Maybe she's going to die where she's going, I don't know."
-
00:31:27
So I got shifted over to another waiting room
-
00:31:31
and I'm sitting in this waiting room.
-
00:31:33
I'm looking around and I'm just -- I'm just --
-
00:31:36
I'm just nervous and I'm I'm not happy
-
00:31:39
because I told you waiting rooms freak me out.
-
00:31:41
I don't -- I don't like waiting rooms.
-
00:31:43
Things good don't happen for me inside waiting rooms.
-
00:31:48
And I finally realized, I've got to stop being a victim here.
-
00:31:51
I've got to do something about this.
-
00:31:52
So I got out my phone and I had my earbuds in as well,
-
00:31:58
and what I did was I found a playlist
-
00:32:02
or a specific song that I have been playing in my mind
-
00:32:07
again and again.
-
00:32:09
That song as a few years old now and it goes,
-
00:32:14
May the King of my heart --
-
00:32:18
- be the mountain where I run
-
00:32:20
The fountain I drink from
-
00:32:24
Oh, He is my song.
-
00:32:26
- And the refrain of it is you are good, good, oh,
-
00:32:34
you are -- and I'm in listening to this thing,
-
00:32:37
and I realized, OK, I'm going to start, like,
-
00:32:40
worshiping and being loud here.
-
00:32:41
So I went outside, I got in the hallway
-
00:32:46
and I just had that song on endless repeats
-
00:32:50
again and again and again.
-
00:32:52
I'm worshiping and I'm telling God,
-
00:32:54
"You're good. You're good. Yes, You are."
-
00:32:57
And what am I doing?
-
00:32:58
I'm telling myself, I'm reminding myself, "Brian,
-
00:33:01
you've seen God show up in your life again and again and again.
-
00:33:05
Brian, you've seen the goodness of God in all kind of ways.
-
00:33:09
You graduated when you shouldn't have graduated.
-
00:33:11
He saved you out of a house fire.
-
00:33:13
He's blessed you with a family, going on and on and on.
-
00:33:16
And what I was doing was reminding myself that He is good,
-
00:33:19
that He's the King of my heart.
-
00:33:20
And I was telling God, "God, no matter what happens here,
-
00:33:25
you and I are good.
-
00:33:27
If I don't talk to her,
-
00:33:29
if I've got to feed her with a spoon the rest of her life,
-
00:33:31
if we're not taking walks together.
-
00:33:33
God, you and I are good because You're good.
-
00:33:38
My opinion of You is not going to be negatively,
-
00:33:42
permanently affected because of whatever happens with my wife."
-
00:33:46
(music: You're never gonna let, You're never gonna let me down)
-
00:33:51
When you come to a place like that with your faith,
-
00:33:54
there's a power that comes into your life,
-
00:33:56
there's a there's a freedom,
-
00:33:58
there's a there's a lightness that comes into your life.
-
00:34:01
A core aspect of God, a core aspect of your faith
-
00:34:07
must be that God is good.
-
00:34:09
In the very beginning of the Bible Genesis 1:3 says:
-
00:34:20
God separated the light from the darkness.
-
00:34:23
We need to separate in our life the darkness
-
00:34:26
from the light of who God is and what He's doing.
-
00:34:30
Are you in a waiting room right now?
-
00:34:33
A waiting room,
-
00:34:34
maybe not a literal medical hospital waiting room,
-
00:34:37
but are you in a waiting mode waiting to see what happens?
-
00:34:44
Waiting to see if you're getting divorced,
-
00:34:50
waiting to see if you're getting a job
-
00:34:53
after having just graduated and the job market isn't what --
-
00:34:56
Are you in a waiting room wondering what's going to happen with your business?
-
00:35:03
All of us are going to come to waiting room moments.
-
00:35:06
We're going to have to wrestle with whether or not God is good.
-
00:35:10
And what happens in that situation may turn out well,
-
00:35:13
it may turn out poorly in the immediate sense of the thing,
-
00:35:19
but we've got to believe and see that God is good.
-
00:35:22
Now, my story here, it had a happy ending.
-
00:35:28
And I'm actually hesitant to tell you
-
00:35:31
about the happy ending
-
00:35:33
only because I've seen a few miracles in my life.
-
00:35:37
I've seen some.
-
00:35:38
Miracles are real and they happen.
-
00:35:41
Healings are real and they happen, as one kind of miracle.
-
00:35:44
miracles are very rare and they're very far between.
-
00:35:49
If they were common and if there was a formula
-
00:35:52
where you could follow and get one,
-
00:35:55
it wouldn't be called a miracle.
-
00:35:57
It'd be called a really awesome thing
-
00:35:59
that you can strong arm.
-
00:36:00
But miracles are rare and we can't predict them.
-
00:36:03
We can't strong arm them, but they do happen.
-
00:36:06
And I've had more than enough things that I've prayed for
-
00:36:08
and I thought that God should be saying yes to
-
00:36:10
and He didn't say yes to it and it didn't happen
-
00:36:13
and it didn't negatively affect my faith.
-
00:36:16
But then this one was a bit different.
-
00:36:20
The nurse comes out and says, "OK, she's out.
-
00:36:24
The doctor's ready to see you."
-
00:36:25
We go into the room, there's a doctor, there's my wife.
-
00:36:28
She's sitting up. She's looking around.
-
00:36:32
And she's talking and she has this stutter.
-
00:36:36
I can live with that.
-
00:36:38
I can live -- she's moving limbs like,
-
00:36:40
"OK, I can live with that."
-
00:36:42
I looked at Doc
-
00:36:43
and Doc is give me the rundown of what happened.
-
00:36:45
And I said, "So, so we're good then, huh?
-
00:36:47
We're good. It's all -- we're good, like a 100% recovery?"
-
00:36:53
He went, "Let's just wait.
-
00:36:56
This is going to be a very long and difficult process
-
00:37:03
to some sort of recovery."
-
00:37:05
I was like, OK, all I know is my wife is stuttering
-
00:37:10
and she can look around.
-
00:37:12
That's better than I thought.
-
00:37:13
That's a new one in the Rolodex.
-
00:37:18
She went to her room, a recovery room.
-
00:37:20
And we went in and I just started taking pictures
-
00:37:25
and taking videos because a miracle
-
00:37:29
was unfolding right before our very eyes.
-
00:37:32
- We're just going to take a couple of steps.
-
00:37:34
- She walked steps within hours
-
00:37:38
of not being able to move anything in her body.
-
00:37:41
- Woo-hoo, I said just a couple steps.
-
00:37:44
- The pictures in her brain of the blood shut down
-
00:37:48
on one entire side of her brain and how it was opened up
-
00:37:51
after they go into a groin with a little pincher
-
00:37:53
and they go up and they pinched the thing
-
00:37:56
and they squirt the medicine.
-
00:37:58
And how much is the Holy Spirit
-
00:38:01
and the very presence of God doing it?
-
00:38:03
And how much is medicine? I don't know.
-
00:38:05
I'm just saying it's all good and it's all God.
-
00:38:09
And all we do know is that none of
-
00:38:11
the medical professionals that were in that hospital
-
00:38:19
- Thank you.
-
00:38:20
- I came in 48 hours ago with a really serious stroke,
-
00:38:28
but here I am.
-
00:38:31
- Within days she was playing tennis.
-
00:38:35
She was playing tennis.
-
00:38:38
Now, I almost hesitate to tell that story because
-
00:38:41
this is a storybook ending and it has a bow on it.
-
00:38:46
I have other things that don't have cute bows on them,
-
00:38:50
and I know you do.
-
00:38:51
And I don't want you to sit back and say,
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00:38:53
"Well, God didn't give me a miracle.
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00:38:56
God didn't do that for me."
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00:39:00
I almost don't like to tell miracle stories because
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00:39:03
it hurts some of us because we get bitter
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00:39:06
or we question whether or not I'm good enough.
-
00:39:09
Is it that I'm not good enough,
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00:39:11
that God doesn't want to bless me with something?
-
00:39:15
If you don't know God is a good Father,
-
00:39:18
you're going to see Him as a slave driver
-
00:39:20
and you'll always try to work your way into His goodness.
-
00:39:23
If you don't see God as a good King,
-
00:39:25
you'll always try to actualize yourself
-
00:39:27
and come into your own authority,
-
00:39:29
which will never get you the power God wants for your life.
-
00:39:34
We want you to have the power that God wants for your life.
-
00:39:37
And we want you to feel His closeness.
-
00:39:41
We want you to feel His presence in your life.
-
00:39:43
We're all going to face suffering, every last one of us.
-
00:39:46
Jesus tells us that's going to happen.
-
00:39:48
But we want to be hopeful and we want
-
00:39:50
to be resilient people despite the circumstances.
-
00:39:53
We want to wrestle during this Journey with the question
-
00:39:56
of is God good?
-
00:39:58
And we're going to come to see, I believe, that He is good if--
-
00:40:02
if you do the work of this Journey,
-
00:40:05
if you show up every week,
-
00:40:07
if you get into a group because people are critical.
-
00:40:14
I got a text on my phone while I was in that waiting room.
-
00:40:17
My friend said, "Hey, we got some stuff for you
-
00:40:21
in the parking lot, we got some beers for you."
-
00:40:24
I was like in the midst of the difficulty, I was like,
-
00:40:29
"Beers in a parking lot. Sounds good to me."
-
00:40:34
I went down just dying in a pile
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00:40:36
and these guys came up to me
-
00:40:38
and they open up their cooler.
-
00:40:40
And we sat on my tailgate of my truck.
-
00:40:42
And they just put their arms around me
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00:40:45
and they tried to cheer me up and they prayed for me.
-
00:40:48
And it was it was the goodness of God that I was feeling.
-
00:40:53
I didn't know what's going to happen with Lib at that point,
-
00:40:56
but I knew God's goodness was coming
-
00:40:58
through these friends of mine that were here right now.
-
00:41:02
For you to go through this Journey
-
00:41:05
and to encounter the goodness of God,
-
00:41:06
you're going to have to be with people,
-
00:41:07
whether it's a Zoom group or people in a home,
-
00:41:10
you've got to do that, that's the journey.
-
00:41:12
You're going to have to do some work.
-
00:41:13
You're going to have to do some reflection.
-
00:41:15
You're going to have to open your mouth and taste things.
-
00:41:18
oh, taste and see that the Lord is good.
-
00:41:23
Blessed is the man and woman who takes refuge in him.
-
00:41:27
I want you to take refuge in Him
-
00:41:28
and I want you to taste Him.
-
00:41:30
He's a good Father. He's a good King.
-
00:41:33
And as His child, there's a new future waiting for you
-
00:41:37
if you can embrace that He's good, because He is good.
-
00:41:43
And that's what we're going to find out in this Journey.
-
00:41:45
God, I pray that Your goodness would just overcome us
-
00:41:49
and it would fill us
-
00:41:51
and it would take us to a new adventure.
-
00:41:54
It would take us to a place
-
00:41:56
that is fulfilling and life giving.
-
00:41:59
God, we want to see You the way You are,
-
00:42:01
not the way we just want to feel that You should be.
-
00:42:05
WE want to see the God who really is
-
00:42:07
and want to see You as good.
-
00:42:08
Would you do that this week in this Journey? Amen.
-
00:46:32
- I'm worshiping and I'm telling God, "You're good."
-
00:46:35
And when I was doing it I was reminding myself
-
00:46:37
that He is good, that He's the King of my heart.
-
00:46:39
And I was telling God, "God, no matter what happens here,
-
00:46:44
You and I are good."
-
00:51:21
- Man, as you can see, this Journey is going to be good
-
00:51:25
and we don't want you to miss a single week of it.
-
00:51:28
There is so much more in store.
-
00:51:30
- The Journey has 3 parts to it
-
00:51:32
and get the most out of the Journey, you have to do all 3.
-
00:51:35
You've already done part 1, which is watch the weekend.
-
00:51:37
Congratulations, you're a third of the way through.
-
00:51:39
Part 2 is to do your individual work,
-
00:51:41
challenges, thought provoking questions
-
00:51:43
inside the Crossroads Anywhere app.
-
00:51:45
Part 3 is to meet with the group
-
00:51:47
to process through what you're learning.
-
00:51:49
- Yeah, like Kyle said, that group is so critical, guys.
-
00:51:53
If you don't do it, you are missing out.
-
00:51:55
And we've made it so easy for you.
-
00:51:57
You can go to Crossroads.net/journey
-
00:52:00
and there will be all the information you need
-
00:52:02
to get into a group and some people who are way smarter
-
00:52:04
and a lot more organized than Kyle and I
-
00:52:06
are actually going to help you get into a group
-
00:52:08
if that's what you want to do.
-
00:52:10
- And getting that individual work,
-
00:52:11
the individual challenge is easy too,
-
00:52:13
just download the Crossroads Anywhere app.
-
00:52:14
It's inside the Google Play store, the Apple App Store.
-
00:52:17
Get it? It's free.
-
00:52:19
- It's fantastic.
-
00:52:20
Well, we've had such a great time with you guys
-
00:52:22
in week one of the Good God Journey,
-
00:52:24
and we cannot wait to see you till next time.
-
00:52:27
- I can't wait to just stay in this jersey here for me,
-
00:52:29
this, what does this called, a jumpsuit?
-
00:52:31
and I don't think Kyle is going to take his off.
-
00:52:34
Anyway, we're so excited that you guys joined us.
-
00:52:37
Thanks so much and see you next time.